Robert Cummings stars in an E. Jack Neuman script about a cocky young man who makes a “business” of answering newspaper classified ads for furs. He goes from con job to con job, and his girlfriend likes the money and gifts she gets because of it. In his scam, he schmoozes the sellers, gets their cooperation in a fake negotiation, then pulls a gun on them to grab the goods without paying. Every day, he reads the morning newspaper classified ads section looking for a new opportunity. The ads are run by women who find they need cash and are forced to sell their expensive furs to get it. He knows who to target: these women were usually alone, reducing his risk of being caught, which makes it easy to get away.
He took a gun on his ventures. He would threaten them with it, with no intent of using it, but it was always there just in case things got out of hand. You know Cummings’ character is cold-blooded because of the way he loads his gun as the story gets underway. “One for the money…” sings in a monotone, continuing until the sixth bullet is loaded, “and six to blow… if I have to.” He’s been successful at this before, but the hold-up that starts the broadcast goes badly. After he robs the woman of the fur and is leaving, her husband arrives home, unexpectedly. There is a fight, and he pistol whips the husband into unconsciousness. He still has the fur, and has to turn it into cash. When he tries to dispose of that stolen mink coat, he learns that the husband died of injuries sustained in the attack. His regular “fence” won’t have anything to do with him or the coat because he is now sought by the police for murder. He has to get out of town, so he and his girlfriend decide to get a car through the morning want ads. It just so happens that the home they visit to buy the car is a trap. Two police officers are posing as husband and wife. They start peppering peppering them with questions, and the girlfriend is incriminated by the very fur from the home where he bludgeoned the husband. The want ad scammers were themselves scammed by a want ad.
Larry Thor is back as a policeman. The script cover from the Auto-Lite ad agency archive has him doubling as Walter, the fence. That part is clearly played by Charles Calvert, and not Thor. Someone forgot to fix the typo on the cover sheet! It is amusing that Calvert plays the beaten husband, and then reports the husband’s murder to Cummings’ character when he explains he can’t fence the fur coat.
“One for the money…” is a children’s rhyme from the early 1800s, usually recited to start a race. The rhyme ends with “and four to go,” but Cummings’ character adds a nefarious five and six as he loads the gun.
Newspaper “want ads” have basically disappeared, replaced by websites like eBay and Craigslist and also online job listings. The classified ad sections of newspapers were often the most profitable pages for newspaper owners when calculated as revenue per square inch of page. While the Internet may have reduced the desire to get news from newspapers, it was the loss of revenues from classified ads that killed their profits. (There were estimates that the gross profit margin of classified ads was 90%, and maybe even higher). The loss of those cash-cow profits created havoc with newspaper operations because none of the other revenue sources could make up for the shortfall.
The mink coat being sold in the opening of the story is valued at about $4000 retail. The wife was offered $2800 by a friend. The scammer offers $3400 (almost $40,000 in US$2024), in cash. The average US household income in 1954 was $4200, so these values of the fur coat mentioned in the dialogue were intended to make an impression on the listeners. Since fur coats were highly sought at the time, the idea of having to sell one to make ends meet meant that you were in real financial trouble.
The dramatic portion of the program was rehearsed and recorded on Sunday, January 17, 1954. Rehearsal began at 11:00am, recording began at 3:30pm, and concluded at 4:00pm.
Mrs. Cornelius Vanderbilt Whitney appeared in the commercials to support the Auto-Lite initiative to donate $100,000 to the favorite charities of 25 selected listeners. That is nearly $1.2 million in US$2024 dollars, or $48,000 per awardee. It is not clear it Whitney was live in the studio on the day of broadcast, recorded in the drama session, or recorded separately. The Vanderbilts and the Whitneys were known for their generous philanthropy. Her presence added credibility to the Auto-Lite charitable effort.
LISTEN
TO THE PROGRAM or download in FLAC or
mp3
https://archive.org/details/TSP540125
THE CAST
ROBERT CUMMINGS (Ralph Vernon), Mary Jane Croft (Wilma), Virginia Gregg (Frances the Policewoman), Paula Winslowe (Mrs. Phelps), Charles Calvert (Mr. Frank Phelps / Walter), Larry Thor (Policeman / Narrator)
COMMERCIAL: Harlow Wilcox (Announcer), Jerry Hausner (Cabby), unknown actor (Hudson dealer)
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