Antony Ellis writes a Christmas story about gangsters in a comedic Runyon-esque style. Two rival gangsters want each other out of the way. Machine Gun Benny sends a note to Ricky McQueen that they’re going to shoot him next time they see him. Ricky decides to send him a Christmas gift as a peace offering, except it will be a gift of a timed explosive. Ricky’s girl wants an expensive fur, and he finally gives in, but he asks for an extra gift box that he will use for the bomb. It’s obvious that the packages will get mixed up, and even though you know they will, it’s still fun to listen how it happens. Of course, the fur goes to Machine Gun Benny, and he’s thrilled because his girlfriend is thrilled and never saw such a “herman” coat. That means only one thing. Ricky has the box that will blow up. One of his men, however, didn’t set the timer up correctly, on purpose. It is Christmas, after all. You shouldn’t do mob hits so close to the holidays. All is well, Benny apologizes for the threat to Ricky, and was so thrilled he invited everyone over for some “X-mas cheer.” (Don’t tell Ricky… he still has to buy his girlfriend that fur since the package was mis-directed!)
It’s a fun script with over-the-top stereotypical mob guy characterizations. With character names like “Arnie the Grunt” and “No-Nose Fibush,” there must have been lots of laughter around the first desk-read of the script.
There are two surviving recordings, and the network broadcast is the better one. The Armed Forces Radio Service (AFRS) recording is of slightly lesser quality, but quite listenable.
LISTEN
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mp3
https://archive.org/details/TSP551213
THE CAST
Jack Kruschen (Ricky McQueen), Stacy Harris (Swifty), Eve McVeagh (Millie), Benny Rubin (Artie the Grunt + Machine Gun Benny), Junius Matthews (No-Nose Fibush), Joe Kearns (Mr. Minchin), Larry Thor (Narrator)
Peter Leeds was originally cast as “Artie the Grunt” and “Machine Gun Benny.” He was replaced by long-time vaudevillian, comedian, and radio and television actor Benny Rubin.
Classic radio researcher and international voice actor Keith Scott notes:
I am again so impressed with the commitment of these classic radio actors who created these highly enjoyable hood characters just for this short broadcast. Kruschen is great as Ricky. Yes, it is definitely Benny Rubin replacing the original casting of Peter Leeds. Even though Leeds was capable and would do fine comedy parts for Stan Freberg's 1957 radio show, I think Ellis decided that Rubin was a better choice for this essentially comic gangster tale.
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